It's ok to not be ok

So I'd like to write about something that's very close to my heart. Something that has always been a very hush, hush topic particularly here in the UK. However this is changing and I for one couldn't be more pleased.

I'm talking about mental health. For those that aren't aware, mental health affects 1 in 4 people at any given point in a year and 1 in 10 young people, so chances are you know someone or have been in contact with someone who has experienced mental health issues. It is the number 1 killer in men and recent reports suggest that the incidence is actually much higher than 1 in 4, but not every sufferer will be oficially diagnosed due to fears of how this may affect them.

More shockingly 9 out of 10 people experience stigma and discrimination because of their mental health and 3 ouf of 4 people fear the reactions of others when confiding in them. Ok so enough with the figures. The message is simple: so many more people than we realise suffer with some form of mental health and yet sadly we are too afraid to talk about it openly.

What really bugs me (I can feel a rant coming on here) is that anyone who is diagnosed with a physical illness or an injury such as a broken leg, is of course still seen as the same person. People treat them as normally as they would anyway and those around them most likely offer their sympathy and support 'oh poor you it must be awful having a broken leg/diabetes/coeliac disease.' We quickly feel the need to be good people and 'do the right thing' by being there in their time of need or distress.

However, disclose to someone that your illness is mental and not physical and it's like you just turned round and admitted that all this time you've secretly been an alien. SILENCE. Staring. More silence. Now don't get me wrong, not every person will react in this way. However there does seem to be a big majority of people who simply do not know how to react and after finding out that their friend/family/collegue is suffering with mental health, appear to change the way they behave around this person. Unfortunately some go as far as completely abandoning and disowning the individual; they are no longer deemed good enough or are seen as an extra nuisance in an already hectic life.

Nothing infuriates me more than this sense of opinion. Why is it ok and justifiable to be physically ill but not ok to be mentally unwell? Why does any form of physical injury have people bending over backwards to help out, but when it's the mind that is poorly, people back away or think it's just the individual being weak and pathetic, or moping about feeling sorry for themself? It's ok to be a diabetic but not ok to be for example, a bipolar disorder sufferer. It is wrong and it's time that this consensus changed. It is not shameful to admit you have suffered from mental health - just look at the sheer amount of celebrities who have admitted their own demons such as Catherine Zeta-Jones who was diagnosed with bipolar disorder, Frank Bruno with major depression, Mary-Kate Olsen with an eating disorder -the list is endless. Out of my own personal circle of friends, I can think of at least 5 different individuals who have suffered with some form of mental health illness.

Suffering with a mental health condition does not change who the real person is underneath. Of course it can affect their behaviour on the outside such as becoming withdrawn and finding things difficult to cope with, so it can seem like the person has become unrecognisable but deep own they are still there; it's just the illness that's masking the real them, the fun-loving, outgoing character that they really are. Don't give up on anyone you know who suffers with mental health. I know it can be so hard and awkard not knowing what to say to them, but just offer to be there when they need to talk, just be someone they cansimply phone up and cry to. Be someone who can provide them with distractions such as going out for a coffee or brwsing the shops. Just being there is quite simply the best thing any person can do when supporting someone.

Time To Change is a fantastic campaign in association with Mind and Rethink - 2 leading mental health charities in the UK, that is campaiging for people, for us to talk openly about mental health. The more we talk about it and the more open we are, the more we are fighting back at the shameful stigma and horrendos discrimination that associates this awful illness. It's ok to talk and it's ok to admit if you have mental health problems - it is not a sign of weakness but a sign of strength, as it is those who try to be too strong all the time that end up suffering. So I joined the Time To Change website and made my pledge to talk about mental health - now it's time to make yours and get the message out that it's ok to not be ok. http://www.time-to-change.org.uk/home

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